Basically I tried using the flag multiple times when I'm insulted and you have failed repeatedly to remedy the situation and there were even times you basically unflagged the people who have been offensive. I'm left in a situation where I invested a lot of time into writing comments and I have to just take it and I have no mechanism to protect myself because every response I make is an opening for them to subtract my karma.

It's emotionally taxing to invest time into writing comments here and emotionally taxing to read insulting criticism and just sit there and take the insult when you've basically been ignoring my flags.

The fact that you selectively moderate everything has led me to realize that it's not worth it to invest time to write my opinions on HN. What's outrageous is that I've been here 9 years and I just decided it's not worth it to let this bad actor insult me and sit here while you basically ignore the whole situation.

The only reason you responded is because I decided to defend my self and this amped up the situation two fold. Other than that his rude responses would have been completely ignored even if I flagged his posts.

>I'm sad to ban someone who's been here for 9 years and made many positive contributions,

This is just not true. You aren't even aware of what positive contributions I have made to HN. I've just been here for a while.

Why am I even writing this. It's not like you care enough to change.

Would it be equivalent to contracting some software system to a a company that would build the system using SQL?

If you think this, but I have a way to make something 10x easier that you can't or don't know how to do then I can sell my idea to you as a service for a monthly subscription fee.

edit Got a lot of vote downs. This was a genuine question from someone completely ignorant on what ERP is. Not trying to say that SQL is better, but I'm asking this because I'm ignorant of what ERP is and the description makes it appear as if it's a database.

What's the difference? would be better wording I guess.

When something seems ambiguous you need to shed your biases and follow the logic and evidence. Read what I wrote in my response and both dispute and reason about the logic and evidence behind it. If you find the logic to be correct then we're good, if you find it to be incorrect then both of our premises are logically flawed.

Any change in belief that will influence their way of life will raise psychological shields. People will very readily change their logic to maintain a belief if that meant preserving other other aspects of their lives that they have put time and effort into.

This book is written for people who already understand the true nature of science and religion. I highly doubt it can convert people, I have yet to find a technique or even a book that has the ability to do so. It's just the way people are...

Whenever you see someone convert from religion to science most of the time the underlying foundations of it had nothing to do with logical realization and more to do with some form of minor or major trauma.

If you experienced a conversion to science from religion and you yourself describe the experience as a "logical realization" I would argue that you probably weren't that invested in the religion in the first place OR that there was some associated trauma that coincided with the "logical realization."

It is 100% evidence based. Reduction of gatherings = reduction in transmission. There's no way around this. People may be more likely to get covid from costco, but reducing interaction to only costco is still reduction of transmission.

This idolization of Elon Musk and contrarian logic that really doesn't even make common sense is getting on my nerves.

It's like one of those people who said that face masks weren't protecting people from covid using faulty but overconfident logic.

Uh hello? A face mask blocks light and slows down

You're here worrying about semiconductor foundries? Why? Your phone already has enough processing power to guide a nuclear bomb into the white house. It's already a concern and it's already too late. Taiwan and the rest of the world has computing technology well past a "security concern."

Of course anyone who's not white and American if they have any form of computing technology that's better than the America makes it a security risk. Are you actually afraid or are you so arrogant that you believe that only America should have the latest and greatest technologies?

Makes sense because only a country with a wise and mature president like trump and citizens genius enough to vote for him are privileged enough to have "technology."

I'm tired of these racist bigoted opinions from blind white people who don't understand of the world. Grow up. Stop being racist.

That's EOD here.

Your parents, that is if you have parents that love you this way. Many don't but many do.

Every single one of your other relationships relies on effort by you to maintain. If you violate certain societal norms all bets are off. All relationships are basically just mutual trade agreements except for the parent - child bond. It's a cynical world view but it's real, there are lines everywhere that you have to make efforts not to cross because you're aware that if those lines are crossed people will abandon you.

And so do all regular people thank you very much. My grandparents abused my parents. I know all about it. I've been told every story. Do not think you have privileged knowledge just because you've been abused? Do I think I have privileged knowledge just because I haven't? No. I don't. But I can honestly say that I don't know first hand what it's like to be abused just like you don't know first hand what it's like to have a parent love you unconditionally.

One of my parents ran away from home for being abused. He had to live on the streets until he was 17 before he was able to make something of himself and become self sufficient.

>You, however, as your reply shows, are congenitally unable to consider that some parents maltreat their children and that these parents look to the outside world like well-adjusted people.

Did you read any of the posts I wrote? I am literally only talking about parents who LOVE their children. NEVER did I say that child abuse doesn't exist. These are completely different things. I even went further to emphasize this point multiple times.

>That's EOD here.

You know what my grandparents said to my dad before they beat him? "End of discussion."

I'm not even slightly kidding here, this is literally the what he said and the attitude he had... my way or the highway. Additionally, this was in Asia, you think there's child protection services back then in Asia? A kid was owned by their parents and beating kids was a part of culture. Beating kids until they're unconscious was probably illegal but given the culture almost always overlooked 99.99% of the time.

Watch where you take your arguments because the hatred, lack of open mindedness, lack of emotional control, lack if willingness to discuss things and lack of empathy for people who disagree with you is a precursor to abuse.

We're all blind in certain sense. I'm thinking people like you who were possibly abused cannot see the other side of the coin. Can you imagine a bond so strong that for parents with abusive/toxic children there is no choice.

If my child was a psychopathic killer, I have to love him and support him until the bitter end. I have many choices in life such as the choice of committing a crime or refraining from committing a crime. The choice of risking my own life to save another or watching someone else die.

For my child, I do not have a choice.

If a parent-child bond exists, I think it's the strongest bond in all human relationships. Many mothers describe it as taking a piece of your soul and letting it walk around outside of your body. It doesn't exist in all cases but when it does exist there's nothing else like it.

But obviously not every parent and child will have this bond, I'm sorry if you or anyone reading this didn't.

Your assumption is incorrect. Where in any of my posts did I say that people are under obligation to maintain a relationship with parents? I absolutely NEVER said this.

This is what I said and I quote verbatim:

"I think it's absolutely worth it to try and establish contact and maintain a relationship if you feel that the relationship problems are superficial and underneath it all your parents do love you."

This was the situation I was in. This is the situation the person in the NYTimes article is describing. I'm just keeping on topic here.

Look there are definitely horrible parents out there. I'm fortunate to not have had parents that would beat the shit out of me or torture me. I'm just keeping in line with the topic of the NYTimes article. If you don't feel "your parents love you" then absolutely do not open up a relationship.

Basically bad relationships with parents who still ultimately love you is the theme that the article and I am targeting.

If you don't have that underlying relationship with your parent then don't try to reconnect. You be the judge, I'm not trying to ask people to reconnect with parents who are psychopathic. I'm asking people to reconnect with parents who mean well and actually do love you but have ultimately made grave mistakes in the past.

Never did I say every parent and every situation is like this. I am saying for THIS situation and the situation described in the article it is appropriate.

I know that when someones parents are toxic and abusive they need to be cut off.

However, for many parents when the situation is reversed they do not have a choice. The love is too great and the parents have to stick with the child until the very very end.

If you murdered someone, a good number of parents will never abandon you. They will give up everything to help you including their own lives.

Do you have a friend or someone other than your parents who will stick with you no matter what? Tell me about it.

I mostly posted because I feel a lot of people have bad relationships with parents that actually do love them but for various other reasons (psychological problems, poverty, stress, drugs etc... ) ended up just having a bad relationship with their parents.

I think it's absolutely worth it to try and establish contact and maintain a relationship if you feel that the relationship problems are superficial and underneath it all your parents do love you.

In that article, the mother lost contact with both of her children. It is not a trivial situation to be in when both children don't want contact. She must have done many things that were really serious and really horrible. But her last email she wrote that she loves both of them no matter what, and I think that is real.

What I am saying is that as imperfect as people are as much damage and toxicity they have done, if you sense that underneath it all there's genuine love then it's absolutely worth maintaining that relationship because you're never going to get someone to love you like this again. If true love even exists, it can only exist from parent to child.

Despite this, I truly believe the statement below:

If you don't have parents that will stick with you while you're still in prison for 30 years, then you don't have anyone on the face of this earth who will do this for you. You are alone.

I would say it's the majority though, as in over 50% for sure.

I say the above from anecdotal experience from my parents and other parents I know, and from quotations I hear from people actually living in prison.

I guess drugs throw off all the priorities, because in the end the actual mechanism that triggers love is in itself a chemical/drug as well.