- join jiu jitsu (people here are so supportive, it such a solid community and it gets you crazy active)

- join a church you like (believe it or not, there are great ones out there where you can find people that care about you the way God wants to have a personal relationship. In those communities people care about whats going on in your life and it gets your caring about other people. And as a bonus, people will put together pot lucks, bbqs, outings. Gets you in planning mode)

- I started reading books again, novels. Evenings without my family being together in a house alone was rough for a long while. I stopped watching shows in the evenings now and have a much more consistent bedtime routine that involves reading an actual fun book. This has gotten me out of my head, out of my laptop, out of the screen and enjoying stories again. Highly recommend!

If you're ever struggling, feel free to reach out. I am starting a discord server for this community because this seems to come up a lot and HN comments doesn't seem to be a great place to have consistent connection. https://discord.gg/Hzu3UrthHn

The discomfort you feel is real but manageable. It's good news because you just need to be consistent in doing 1 small thing each day or each week. For me it was, I'm going to go to church and find a small group I'm interested in. Then from there I added in - I'm going to learn guitar and see an actual professional teacher to teach me so I have an in person contact with someone who cares about my progress. Then it was, I'm actually going to regularly have real phone calls with my family (my mom, my brother, etc). I have a daughter so it's much easier for me, but I also live remotely so there's that.

*Know and Be known*: Be in regular proximity with people who know you and care about you and you care about them. Reciprocal care and community.

*Prepare and eat real food*: Not just basic nutrition, but the act of cooking. This ritual is grounding and hands on and removing this entirely separates something so fundamental to life.

*Hydrate*: Cognitive function rapidly degrades with something that can be so simply addressed.

*Sleep rhythm* Constant circadian disruption can often induce symptoms that look like psychiatric disorders.

*Physical exertion*: Your body needs to be physically tired regularly or your nervous system will start misfiring. Anxiety, restlessness, racing thoughts is a lot of just an under-used body.

*Sunlight* Light exposure regulates so much downstream biology that being indoors for days starts warping your sense of time and mood in subtle ways.

*Use your hands* Build something, fix something, cook, play an instrument, do something tangible so you aren't fixated on knowledge work.

*Silence and stillness* Walk, sit, pray, meditate, - make this unstructured processing time without constant signal and input.

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=47145452

Points: 4

# Comments: 0

* Get out on the water or underwater (if you dive)

* Find events to go to in your area (pick anything, doesn't matter, if it's going on try and go do it and try and do it with people)

- 15+ years full stack engineer

Comments URL: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=41651711

Points: 6

# Comments: 2